Commit to Date Night. It’s easy to push fun time aside; less easy if you set a date. Don’t wait for Valentine’s Day or a birthday to do things together with your partner. Schedule something monthly. Step outside the routine. Restaurant and a movie? Booorrring. Go someplace you’ve never been: wine tasting, festival, karaoke bar. Break from your usual behavior. Be silly. Sing a song to your sweetie in public. Pretend it’s your first date or that you’re strangers meeting for the first time. Have glamour shots taken together. You get the idea.
Have Sex Often and Keep it Fresh. Scheduling sex can take away the spontaneity. Tune in frequently to opportunities. Fan the flames of desire. Try something you’ve both wanted to do that’s been on the back burner. Introduce props or costumes. Change lovemaking locations. Be spontaneous. Try not to schedule it – unless you’re booking a romantic hotel or resort get-away.
Pay Attention. Are you really focused on what your mate is saying to you or are you thinking about the next thing you want to say to them or multi-tasking with your cell phone? Do you have a blank look on your face when they’re talking because your mind is somewhere else? It’s irritating when it’s being done to you. Consider what it’s doing to them? Not paying attention builds walls and resentment.
Have More Heart-to-Heart Discussions. You don’t always have to think about when you should have them or what to talk about. They just come naturally when you pay attention. If something is bugging you, find a way to bring it up. Don’t let it fester. Ask what’s going on when you see that look or feel that weird vibe.
Compliment More, Criticize Less. Remind your sweetie often what you love about them. It’s easy to stop doing that, especially if you’ve been together a long time. They will reciprocate in kind. Hold that critical thought.
Make Them Laugh, Surprised. Tickle their humor bone. Life can get serious and intense. Cut the tension. Show them through words and actions that you remembered something they said. Act on something they’ve been hinting about.
And while you’re committing to these New Year’s relationship resolutions, above all else, be sure to enjoy, respect, and love one another.